Archive Page 2
W T F revisited
Lady Marmalade
Wow, watching this video my life doesn’t seem so bad:
REMEMBER WHEN Mya actually mattered?
REMEMBER WHEN Pink was still black (I think she referred to herself as Pank)?
REMEMBER WHEN Lil’ Kim didn’t look like a reject from Neverland Ranch?
REMEMBER WHEN Christina Aguilera was a huge slutbag and superthin? (Actually, being preggers did her body worlds of good. Trust.)
In any case, they definitely brought it with this song…what with girls auctioning their virginity on-air and on-line, it’s good to know these girls were one step ahead of the ‘peddling ass masquerading as empowerment’ curve
We get a lot of mail here at the Newsmongrel Doghouse Chateau, most of it steaming piles of surprises we leave for whoever has to mow the backyard basura, as they say in Spanish. I have long desired some sort of sigil with which I could easily identify documents and their inherent worth (we had been using the paws up/paws down system, but turning upside down to show displeasure with a letter got tired), and now I found one!
I particular like the one that says ‘file under T for TRASH’…should anyone feel led to purchase one for official use, I am registered at Petsmart.
this just in: OH SHIZ!! edition
What Have You Been In Lately?
Is it just me, or have celebrities taken a step backwards in their shoe preferences? First Rihanna. Then…well, Rihanna. Now my girl Jessica Biel is out and about looking a HOT mess.
SOS...that is, Shower or Stilettos. Take your pick Jess.
See, the thing is with the ‘casual chic’ look so many people are going for, you really need to find a balance between your makeup and attire. Now, Ol’ Girl could have washed her face, maybe put on some eyeshadow (I don’t want to get too crazy, but perhaps some lipgloss???) and I might have looked over the boots. Aww, who am I kidding? Nothing short of Brad Pitt in his skivvies could distract me from those tragic wastes of cowhide. Or she could have worn some cute sandals. Heck, I’d take flip flops over the shenanigans I’m seeing here.
Why does she own these? Why are these boots even available for sale to anyone who doesn’t ride a horse for a living? It’s not even your HOBBY Jessica!!! Are they lined with lambs’ ears? Are you stashing leftovers because Justin won’t let you eat carbs? I want to know. Because seriously, if there’s not an EXTREMELY compelling reason for this nonsense, don’t think I won’t ride with the plane luggage just to come over there and give you a paw to the mouth. TRUST.
OMGWTF Rihanna LMAO Why oh why?
I mean, I don’t hate Rihanna. I’m not a fan either, it’s just whatevs with her. It’s just…the shoes she finds. I don’t…I’m so confused…vapid thought taking over…
I am disturbed...ia
I wish I could have found a better picture. But for anyone who watched the VMAs this year, YOU KNOW. The thing is, it’s not even the thigh high boots that I have an issue with. I mean, my legs are 5 inches long, ALL of my shoes are thigh highs. But when your foot gear stops looking like a cute accessory and starts looking like sausage casing, I’VE got issues.
What’s up Ri? You’re not fat. At all. Are you feeling a little down on yourself because you see what a tool Chris Brown is and realize that you need to be with him at LEAST a year to keep from looking like a ho? Do you have nightmares of terrible dancing and sappy duets dragging your career down like a cement block in open water? Hey, that kind of nightmare might send any girl into a downward spiral. But sweets?
ILL-FITTED SHOES ARE NOT THE ANSWER. Find a pair that fits. You’ll feel so much better. Trust me.
Another column from the great English wit known colloquially as Jeremy Clarkson. A tease:
And then they showed us pictures of the crowd. The boy and I stopped jigging for a closer look. It was even better than we’d expected. The whole Kop was a sea of misery. God, how we laughed. We hadn’t laughed so much since Manchester United were knocked out of the Carling Cup by Coventry City. We hate Manchester United. We think Rooney’s ears are ridiculous and Ronaldo is a big girl. Indeed, my boy came home from school the other day and said: “Dad, do you know what the three best words in the English language are?” “Manchester. United. Nil.”
“Miniature dachshund gnawed off owner’s toe while she slept“
(more)
She probably didn’t give her dog a biscuit…big mistake
W T F ? ?
WOW-I vote FAIL…Kanye can’t even blame his wack vocals on a live performance. My love of Ye is well known, but I can’t cosign this hot mess.
Kanye West-Love Lockdown (studio version)
The Faint – The Geeks Were Right
