This is the opening to one of the dopest (yes, dopest) movies of all time…I hear our oppressors owners, especially the tall and handsome one, whistling this ofter.

I am sad that the shaggy dogs are the lame guards and not the rooster’s tragicomic assistant.

Where's my theme music? I must DANCE!

If only it were just the dress.  But with the five pounds of makeup and funky side hairdo, I did NOT recognize her.  Then let’s see, what else…oh yes, the ruffle on her dress that is ever so slowly making its way around her neck to strangle the life out of her.  And let’s not overlook the unecessarily high white heels.  But the icing on this cracked-out cake has GOT to be the handbag shaped like an f-ing FAN.  I mean PEAS and RICE woman, we get it!  You couldn’t wait to show off your Halloween costume.  Or are you really just pissed that you’ll never be invited to the Latin Emmys and this is your subtle (as in how Paris Hilton is subtlely screaming for someone to care) way of acting out?  Because if that’s the case then you are GROUNDED missy.

P.S. To all you bitches overly helpful commentators, I say this: if the Fug Girls made a mistake, than I can too.

First we see House’s Olivia Wilde looking perfectly glamorous in a white gown.  The subtle beading on the sleeves keeps the dress from being boring without going overboard.

I'll cut you for that dress Olivia. Trust.

 Maybe it’s because we only see her with a lab coat, blah hair and zero makeup on House, but Olivia looks really pretty, right?  Now for Exhibit B.  Lisa Rinna, modeling the trailer trash version of OWilde’s dress with Halle Berry’s hairstyle circa Swordfish:

Where's the chittlins y'all?

To be completely honest, I don’t know that I’ve ever seen this broad before.  And, to be fair, her dress isn’t terrible.  It’s really not.  All I’M saying is that for the Emmy Awards I would have found something that says ‘I’m a glamorous actress’ and not ‘I found Princess Leia’s honeymoon lingerie.’  Maybe it’s just me.

WOW.

People sometimes ask me why I am so sad all the time.  Here’s why: favorite artists that lost their soul (yet somehow found a vocoder)

study: ‘Eating veggies leads to brain shrinkage’ (link)
(seen on Perez)

This song has a really nice, super relaxing vibe to it…it makes me wag my tail happily and sigh with contentment.

P.S.  Apparently there’s a video contest out for the song…I have an idea that I might work with.  You can peep the contest here.